There wasn’t a single part of Willette that wasn’t trembling, the anger that had been driving her stubbornness having turned into fear. Along with a feeling of panic that went beyond any stage fright she had ever known—and might ever know.
The heat flushing her cheeks confirmed she was also embarrassed, and she averted her gaze, unable to look at Rafael.
She’d been exasperated that her actions towards Mr Barr—which could include a broken nose, she’d seen that thanks to her brothers, too—might cause him to ensure that she was banned from auditioning anywhere else.
Rafael discovering what she’d done was far worse. He’d think she was a terrible person, and a foolish one for not believing what others had said about performers.
She’d thought it would be different for her. That all she would do was sing. Now, if the truth got out, she could be shunned. Not even allowed to sing in church.
Her father could be shunned, too, and that would damage the business he’d operated for years that supported her entire family. Her brothers had warned her that a scandal surrounding her performing in London could reach their village, and the tongues of gossips. She’d argued that the gossips knew her and knew she wouldn’t ever be involved in anything scandalous.
Her throat tried to prevent her from swallowing. Because the truth hurt. She’d been wrong about so many things. Including today. It had been wrong for her to agree to go to the zoo with Rafael. Wrong to pretend that everything that had happened hadn’t been her fault.
‘I would much rather that you told me,’ Rafael said.
Willette pressed her trembling hands together in her lap and tried to steady her breath. The tension between them was thick. Silence hanging in the air as heavy as the velvet curtains tied back on the coach’s windows. A part of her wanted to confess, but her thoughts were too tangled. What could she say that wouldn't make everything worse? She trusted Rafael and wanted to tell him the truth, but so much was at stake. Not only her family, her reputation—her future, but his. A man who rescued children and animals, and…
Through her tangled thoughts came an undeniable truth. She’d agreed to go with him to the zoo because she liked him. Liked him too much. Had since they’d met and the idea of spending time with him had been too exciting to resist.
He, however, was pressing for information because he was a rescuer and now wanted to rescue her. Just as he had the night she’d sung at Turnbill. His smile, his kindness, and then his teasing companionship had rescued her that night.
A hint of resolve rose up in her and she forced herself to meet his gaze. ‘You can’t rescue me from this, Rafael.’
His expression softened, but his gaze remained unwavering. ‘Sometimes, it’s not about rescuing,’ he said quietly, ‘but about standing beside someone. Standing up for them when they need the support.’
She felt something opening up inside her, and fought to close it, because she couldn’t let even a sliver of hope in. Couldn’t let her mistakes ruin his reputation. Ruin his life.
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